One of the wisest things I think I have ever read from somewhere other than the Bible was (I think) from Teri Maxwell in her book "Homeschooling with a Meek and Quiet Spirit". She was talking about training our children and she talked about how our expectations should not be the same as our goals. Our expectations are what we expect out of our children as they are trained towards the goals. Whoa. That really hit home for me.
I am a driven person and often feel like everything within my children is intent on fighting against me in achieving and accomplishing what I want done. (oops, doesn't sound too good does it?) I have high expectations for them in many areas of life, often too high. They are too high when those expectations are at the same height as my goals for them and thus become unrealistic. Don't they need room to grow from, for example, having no idea how to clean a room to keeping it tidy and organized? Isn't there a learning process that involves failure and trying again? Somehow I too often forget that they are human and sinful, that they are children and maturing, and that they need lots and lots of training to reach a goal. More than anything, I forget that they need grace from me, just as I receive it from the Lord. This occurs on a daily basis. May I do the same for my children.
It's a tough balancing act isn't it? Discipline, training, grace...parenting. Phew. In a constant desire to find balance I find myself swinging from one end to another, but to remain in the middle would be to become stagnant.
Oh Lord, please help me to more patient and to wisely discern proper expectations for my children as I train them towards wisely discerned goals in all aspects of life. Help me to show firmness and swift action when necessary and grace and forgiveness when appropriate. May my children learn more about you as I live my life to glorify You. - Amen
Great post. Thanks for the reminder!
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